This is a communication from a debt collector.

Your Parents Are In Debt

Portfolio Recovery Associates (PRA) realizes that one painful financial situation that many people face, especially in bad economic times, is when they suspect that their own parents have credit and debt problems. The problem may arise because their parents have reduced income or are now on fixed incomes. Sometimes their ability to manage money is impaired as a result of their aging.

Once you’ve decided to discuss this issue with them directly, you’ll need to be both sensitive and practical in your approach. For example:

1. Look for telltale signs of debt problems. It may be something they say. They may inadvertently disclose their anxiety. Or you may actually see letters from creditors in their homes.
2. If you see numerous credit card offers, that too may be some indication that they’re getting themselves in over their heads.
3. Express concern. Before broaching the topic, think about the kind of language that will best express your real intentions — which is to help them — rather than concern about how much of their money will eventually be left to you.
4. Try starting off by saying something like: “This may be none of my business but…” Even if they refuse to discuss it at that point, at least they’ll know that they have the option if they change their minds.
5. Do NOT suggest in any way that they’re incapable of managing their own finances. That plays into their worst anxieties. Instead, use language like “let me help you out a bit” or “let’s work on this together.”
6. Expect possible emotional or angry reaction and don’t take it personally. Stay cool. Be compassionate.
7. If you want to directly help them pay the debt, present it as a loan that you expect to be repaid — reminding them that yours is a 0% interest rate loan with no fees.
8. Alternatively, suggest a low interest-rate on the money you loan them to encourage the perception that yours is a business proposition, not charity.